The Life and Times of Baby Gordon

GorditaWatch 2006

This blog has had 75 visits, and 184 page views, today. On an average day, we usually get 10 or 15 visits. The Internets love the Gordita! Alisa said on her blog that Baby G.'s late arrival has made her the baby everybody is talking about. Baby Suri? Who's Baby Suri?

No Waffles for Baby

So the pumpkin waffles didn't turn out so well. Turns out I copied the recipe down wrong in my book, and instead of 2 1/2 cups of flour only added 1/2. By the time I realized it, I had used some of the batter to make the disastrous first batch, then didn't really think about how adding the extra 2 cups at that point would throw off the entire recipe. So, into the trash went all the waffles, because they were doughy and didn't taste much like pumpkin (or anything at all).

All of which has me rethinking whether it's really such a good idea that I am becoming somebody's mother. I guess it's a little late to be making that realization ...

Two Free Days

Well, every day it's looking more and more likely that I'm going to be hitching my wagon to the Pitocin train on Friday morning. I never imagined a scenario where I'd have to be induced — I was positive Ms. G. was going to come early. However, at least the positive side of induction is that it takes the guesswork out of labor. I don't have to sit around the house for hours on end wondering if the symptoms I'm having are real. And, it's more than likely (though not guaranteed) that my labor will take only several hours, rather than 24 hours or more.

So I have two more days to enjoy as an independent woman. My first order of the day is going out for a bagel with a library book. Snore — but again, it's one of those little things that I will not be able to do for awhile. Anybody have any other suggestions on final things I should do to relax and enjoy before becoming a mama? (Moms of young children — anything you particularly missed doing after your babies were born?)

Poor Puppy

Bentley is starting to get annoyed with me. The faster I go into labor, the more quickly he can proceed to his grandma and grandpa's house for a luxurious five-day vacation at a resort with a fun, grassy backyard! As it is, he's stuck sleeping late with me (we lolled in bed until 10:30 this morning), eating cookie-filled Kongs and pacing back and forth while the world goes on without him outdoors. Poor little guy.

He's spent the morning with his nose pressed to the screen at the front window, whining. His dog walker just came to pick him up and he was so thrilled he simply couldn't help himself — he jumped and ran and barked until Lori forced him to sit still. One would think that we beat and starve our puppy dogs in the Gordon household, he's so happy to get away. Bentley is one of those dogs who would appreciate living his life outdoors. We could probably put a dog house in the backyard and make him sleep back there, rather than on his $200 dog bed in our warm, quiet bedroom, and he'd be in heaven. Ingrate!

My plans for today: grocery store for staples, baking (pumpkin waffles to freeze for breakfasts, and Alton Brown's chocolate chip cookies), a visit to the library for some entertaining books, the vet to pick up Bentley's eye medicine, and maybe a little time at Gaylord's, if I feel up to it and need to be around people for awhile. Andrew is attending a dinner and party for his company at Suppenkuche tonight, so it's just Bentley and me for awhile. I rented a chick flick (which is not supposed to be too terrible) from Netflix and will probably watch that and dine on leftovers. Whoo. Freaking. Hoo.

Monday Night: Still Pregnant

Yes, it's true. We're all still here. Gordita is learning a new dance; it seems like a cross between the mambo, a "Lord of the Dance" style Irish jig, and kickboxing. It seems to be joyful and festive, and involves a lot of foot action, and also, punching.

Today I went to lunch with Lesley, Joel and Stacey at this new restaurant in Oakland. Then I headed to the hospital for my second antepartum test. Everything is the same, though the monitor showed I had a couple of teensy tiny contractions while I lay there. I couldn't feel them though, so they're not doing me a whole lot of good.

Here are a couple for the It Could Be Worse category though. The woman in the cublicle next to me in the testing room today was 15 days overdue and isn't being induced until Wednesday, and it sounded as though she had actually checked into the hospital two weeks ago thinking she was in labor, stayed for two days and then was sent home. And then, the woman in the cubicle across from me was 35 weeks preggers with twins. One twin was head-up, one was head-down, from the sound of it, meaning she could have to endure both a vaginal birth and a C-section. So, in terms of relative sucktitude, my life is not really so bad.

I unintentionally made a very spicy dish this evening. It was from Real Simple's food excerpt published recently, in an article on casseroles, and it was one of the dishes I was planning to freeze before we ran out of room in our freezer. The recipe called for 3 tablespoons of chipotles in adobo sauce. I should probably have cut back on the chipotles. Regardless, I ate it enthusiastically, hoping that maybe it would upset the balance of things.

How silly has my life become that I am sharing the extremely mundane details of my day with all of you, in an effort to assure you all that I'm not in labor?

Maybe I'll bake something tomorrow. I'm really and truly out of things to do.

Blue Sunday

I woke up this morning with this strange feeling of defeat. The thought actually crossed my mind that we should just unpack the suitcase, put away the bag of snacks that we packed for the hospital and Bentley's overnight bag of food, treats and toys, and throw in the towel, because Gordita was not really going to show up. It was like I'd been stood up for a blind date I was really looking forward to, and was feeling really depressed and demoralized about it, but had begun the process of accepting it and moving on.

Maybe it's because today was so gloomy and cold, and I have been spending too much time doing a lot of nothing lately, and my thoughts are starting to catch up with me.

While Andrew was at the gym this morning I cleaned up the kitchen and listened to the new album of lullabies I bought by one of my favorite bands. When the lullaby "By-Lo" began to play (lyrics: By-lo baby / By-lo baby, by / Mama will love you / All of my life), I stood in the kitchen and cried. Irrational, but I was feeling as though Gordita had made her escape out a back exit and that I'd never actually get to meet her in person. And that felt crummy.

I eventually stopped feeling sorry for myself, and we headed out to watch Martin Scorsese's The Departed, which was incredible and fast-paced and smart and violent, and ironically put me back in cheery spirits. If all the spicy food I've been eating doesn't finally do it for me, maybe a good, old-fashioned gangster film will.

Saturday

Andrew and I have been so relaxed today. It's one of those perfect fall days, sunny but cool, when the light is pale and the leaves are starting to turn and fall. I slept until 10 this morning, and then we were super lazy — reading the paper and my new Entertainment Weekly, watching a little TiVO here and there, finishing up organizing the guest room/office downstairs. After lunch we ran a couple of little errands (buying a TV for the guest room and a dehumidifier for the basement), then took Bentley to the dog park for awhile, and when we got back Andrew played a video game for awhile as I did some email and read the hilarious book Operating Instructions, which I'm planning to pass on to all my new-parent friends as soon as I finished with it.

The whole day we've been good-humored and affectionate, laughing and singing and joking around. After so many months of stress and chaos, packing every weekend with our enormous to-do lists, it feels completely foreign to have a whole Saturday with nothing that really needs to be accomplished. It's wonderful. I'm drinking in every moment.

The best part about it is that this is the place I was hoping to reach while on maternity leave: this feeling of total relaxation. I haven't been here, without the expense of a vacation getaway, in quite a long time. I'm in a place where, if Gordita came tonight, I would be mentally and physicially ready.

(Do you hear that, little girl?)

Friday

The elements of my day:

Waffles. The Tao of Steve on IFC. Conversation with Jen. Hemming curtains. Leftover tuna casserole. A matinee of The Queen (much-anticipated and excellent) at the Piedmont Theater. Housecleaning. Chinese food (going for all the spicy stuff on the menu) at Becky's. Hot chocolate at Bittersweet. Last night's episode of "The Office," downloaded from iTunes. Cleaning up after a particularly destructive Bentley, who destroyed two toys this evening (including Lobster, who has been with us since the beginning). Lots and lots and lots of mean-spirited kicking by my daughter, who should really make up her mind to come out of there if she's so out of room.

All told, a relatively uneventful Friday the 13th.

Reports from the Inside

This afternoon I reported to Alta Bates for my first round of antepartum testing, a.k.a. the non-stress test or NST. I think I might have alarmed some people when I mentioned I was heading to the hospital to have a fetal monitor strapped to my belly, but it is a completely routine thing for women who have surpassed their due dates. I learned once I was there that what we were testing for, in fact, was the health of the placenta and the abundance of amniotic fluid, to guarantee that this nice, warm place where Gordita has decided to remain is still a healthy environment for her.

I spent about 20 minutes with two monitors strapped to my belly, one testing the baby's heartrate and one tracking contractions. The baby's heartrate needed to exceed her baseline heartrate several times during the test to prove that she was active — not that we really needed the heart test to prove that, because as soon as I lay back and had the monitor strapped on, she started kicking and punching like crazy, making the nurse giggle and push gently back at her. Anyway, everything was normal on that front.

Sadly, the contractions test was not as promising. I had not one contraction the entire time I lay there. Boo.

Then I headed downstairs for an ultrasound to make sure the amniotic fluid was still plentiful. It is. We saw that Gordita's head is way down, and then the technician looked around at some other body parts. Sure enough, as she ran the monitor over that one spot on my right side — the spot on my abdomen that is sore and internally bruised from the bludgeoning I receive there every evening — a gigantic foot appeared. No big surprise, but it cracked me up. The tech took a picture and printed it as a souvenier. You better believe that crazy foot is getting documented in the baby album.

I have another test scheduled for Monday afternoon; we'll do it twice a week until I deliver.

Thursday

I had my 41-week doctor's appointment this morning — the one we all thought would never materialize. Everything is normal. The doctor stripped my membranes. For those of you who are unindoctrinated, I will not share the details of that, but it was a relatively painless process overall and not as vile as it sounds. While Dr. T. officially says it is not a "labor inducer," it has been known to help things along if you are "this close" anyway.

I begin antepartum testing this afternoon to make sure all is OK with the baby. That is normal procedure, and it sounds as if I'll need to do it every few days until I give birth. I have to report to Labor & Delivery at the hospital at 4:30 and have a fetal monitor strapped on to make sure the baby's heart rate is OK, my blood pressure is normal, etc. If things don't look normal, induction is non-elective, but otherwise we will proceed naturally.

However, Dr. T. is scheduling an induction for next Friday, October 20 (my mom's birthday), if I haven't delivered by then. So, there's a slight possibility I might be pregnant for another week! But let's hope not.

I'm sitting here debating whether I should take myself out for lunch or stay local. I have some mild cramping after the stripped membrane procedure and am a little paranoid I could start labor. Then again, lunch on the porch at Cato's on this beautiful fall day sounds like just the mental pick-me-up I need. Hmmm....